Situation: My wife called. She told me she’s thinking of moving the kids to California.
Thoughts: What the fuck? This will kill me for sure. She’s getting back at me for being such an asshole.
Feelings: She can’t do this! No way!
Behaviours: Called her, screaming and cursing. She told me I have a choice to make, but she won’t come home until I stop drinking. I cried and begged her to come home. Then I yelled more.
Situation: On light duty. Two dickheads in office walk by and one ‘mimes’ hitting motion, then winks at me.
Thoughts: Everyone hates me. I will never live this down. Everyone is watching me. Everyone knows I am a shitty cop.
Feelings: Worry. Frustrated. Nauseous.
Evidence for painful thoughts: It’s true, everyone knows.
Evidence against painful thoughts: Everyone is too busy to worry about me. Most people thought I was a good cop. People forget.
Rational response (revised thoughts): Fuck him. He can say what he wants, I am getting my life back together. It’s gonna be OK.
Feelings (again): Slightly angry. Nothing really. Who cares anyway!
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